Thursday, November 15, 2007

This just in

Mattel Introduces Barbie-Inspired Clothing Line

Blah blah blah... "The collection, which includes sportswear, vintage-inspired dresses, signature jewelry and handbags, has been designed to combine [the designer’s] inventive, often outrageous style with Barbie’s sophisticated style... The line is ... targeted toward older teens and young adults. “The Barbie by Patricia Field collection is an unapologetically fun and stylish way for girls of all ages to indulge their Barbie fantasy,” [Mattel spokesman] said.

As someone who is not that far removed from young adulthood, and who could conceivably go looking for "vintage-inspired dresses and signature handbags" at my friendly neighborhood Macy's, I took some time to consider what my "Barbie fantasy" might be. Thoughts:

* I'm not sure that I fantasize about being so disproportionately top-heavy that it's physically impossible to stand upright.
* Also, having feet that can only wear heels: not a fantasy.
* Cheesy beefcake boyfriend? Meh.

Nope, my only "Barbie fantasy" turns out to be seeing what happens when you put Barbie in an industrial strength paper shredder.


Nikki said...

*how do you give a blow job to a man who refuses to remove his plastic underwear? and whose fused fingers leave fisting as the only real possibility?

this is the more important concern.

i'll gladly dirty up your blog just as much as you need me to. i like smut. smutty smutt smut.

Kate said...

Oh, Nikki. My poor poor grandmother. I think you just killed her.